- Audible Audiobook
- Grant Cardone (Author) – Grant Cardone (Narrator)
- English (Publication Language)
- 10/11/2016 (Publication Date) – Gildan Media, LLC (Publisher)
Last update on 2022-11-11 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon
I read this book by Grant Cardone multiple times, and I found many ideas that spread false notions among people.
So in this article, I will share my genuine criticism about this book and debunk the myths discussed in the book.
Let’s get started.
Who is Grant cardone?
Grant Cardone is the author of this book.
And he does so many things.
He is the CEO of Cardone Capital.
He has also written 8 business books and runs business programs.
Learn more about him on his LinkedIn Profile.
Is Grant Cardone legit?
A quick search on YouTube will show that he sells motivational programs that are insanely expensive.
Personally, I don’t think there is any need to buy motivation.
Motivation market is hot right now, so many gurus find opportunities and exploit insecurities of people.
Be Obsessed Or Be Average Review Summary
Here is what I learned…
The book promotes the idea of obsession, which is dangerous.
The book’s whole agenda is to numb your intellect. (“Just stop thinking critically and become obsessed with whatever the guy wants you to buy.”)
Don’t fall into that trap.
Here is why:
We all have desires within us.
If I use an analogy:
It’s like a volcano bursting out lava. It won’t stop until it burns everything around itself – until the hot, flaming lava cools a bit down.
You see, it’s a powerful force to reckon with.
And if you use it in the wrong way, that means, if you are crazy about the wrong things, your life will become terrible.
Many people get indulged in unproductive activities as they don’t have anything worthwhile to focus on.
Don’t fall into such traps.
It won’t be much helpful if you don’t understand your actions.
The thing is:
Your desires will pull you in different directions.
So if you are passionate with inner transformation or growth, it will help you thrive in your life.
And it will help you in avoiding the traps in life, e.g., addiction to drugs, porn, movies, etc.
It looks like we all have a void inside us.
So, we run after various things to fill that void.
And the things we choose to fill that void make all the difference in our lives.
Also read: The Power Of Intention Summary
Motivation is temporary, as Big dreams demand effort and dedication.
Throughout his book, Grant tries to motivate you and asks you to be crazy, which is insane.
Let’s admit it:
Getting crazy about achieving something big sounds like a compelling story.
It sounds cool.
But is it really?
For instance, many religions say that desires are problematic.
The lesser, the better.
But the author talks about having a strong obsession.
Obviously, there is a difference of opinion here.
It’s difficult to put your dreams on the back-burner and shift your priorities.
The author claims that he is successful today because of his obsessions, but I doubt so.
The question is:
Should we all be crazy about our dreams? I don’t think so.
Obsession is not good from a spiritual lens.
Your life will get out of balance.
It’s not good to do anything in the extreme.
But if you go by the author’s way of thinking, you’ll face difficulties.
Do we all have great potential? Of course, we all do.
But wrong notions that the author is trying to sell will disturb your quality of life.
Most successful people or people who have achieved something great in their lives were focused about achieving their goals or dreams. But they weren’t mindlessly doing crazy things.
If your only goal is to attain materialistic success and live a shallow life, you can follow the author.
But I think if you want to have holistic growth with a sense of liberation and satisfaction, having fewer desires is a better approach.
Also read: Grit To Great Summary
You can’t get better without changing your current Self.
The harsh reality is:
Most people don’t achieve anything big because they never stop giving excuses.
When we don’t have enough money, we say that demanding more money is a sign of greediness.
Some people even start calling money evil.
Suggested read: The Science of Getting Rich Summary
We have associated negative thoughts with so many things that when it comes to achieving something big, our beliefs pull us back.
Please note that “something big” is very subjective.
Personally, I think true freedom and happiness is the biggest achievement any man could have.
On the flip side, we believe that being rich is the best way to live a happy life.
Of course, not everyone thinks like this.
Finally, it’s your call whether you want to achieve big or just remain the same way all your life.
The fact is:
To become what you want to be, you have to give up on being who you are currently.
It doesn’t matter whether that dream seems impossible at first. There are always ways to solve problems if you search for them.
Don’t expect anyone to tell you how to be successful.
I’m not saying that don’t ask successful people “How to be successful?” I mean that there is no point in taking advice from just anybody.
You have to carefully choose who you are taking advice from.
Why? Because they have accepted their life the way it is.
They hate change. Nobody likes change, or do we?
People want to grow and transform, but don’t want to go through the pain that change comes with.
The question is:
Will you remain stagnant all your life — as the majority of the people on this planet do? Or will you take responsibility like a Hero?
The choice is yours…
Also read: The Habit Of Winning Summary
Follow the right Feedback. Not all advice is worth following.
As discussed, don’t take advice from just anybody.
Feedback is important. But only from the right people.
If you feel that the other person hasn’t achieved your desired goal, simply ignore.
Never take their advice seriously without proper reasoning. Because if you do, it’ll only harm you.
The problem is:
Not all people succeed.
Often people don’t support you when you have big dreams.
Because they don’t believe that achieving something that big is possible.
So, it’s natural to expect long faces from those people.
Don’t expect them to inspire you.
There is no point in searching inspiration in the wrong place, right?
There is a lot of conditioning behind why people never reach their true potential.
So, it’s nobody’s fault. And nobody needs to blame anyone.
A goal-oriented person must expect uncertainty and challenges, which usually scare the hell out of most people.
We all love security.
Insight: If you study Maslow’s hierarchy, you’ll find that safety and security is the second basic need after physiological need in case of human beings.
But if you are a serious person, you won’t give more importance to anything other than your goals.
So that fear of uncertainty will fail to hold you back.
You will not give up easily, unlike most people.
Also read: Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff Summary
Align your Strong Desires with your core purpose.
The thing is:
Passion without knowing your higher purpose is a disaster.
It’s like running full speed in the wrong direction.
We don’t want that, right?
It’s a great thing only when you know what you are doing.
If you know your purpose, your passion can help you achieve your goals faster.
Finding passion is not a big deal.
You have to ask yourself a few questions like:
- “What do I love to do?”
- “What am I good at naturally?”
- “What can I get paid for?”
- “What the world needs in the next 20 years?”
If you have read the book Ikigai, you probably know such questions and will quickly figure out your purpose.
Finding the purpose might look like a tough job at first, but it’s not that hard.
All it needs is a bit of self-awareness and honesty.
You are allowed to make mistakes in finding your true purpose.
Often we require experimentation to realize our true purpose in life.
That’s why you must remain flexible.
All these buzzwords sound like you have to get rigid and just go all in.
You have to go all in. But you also need to be mindful of your purpose.
You will need to check repeatedly whether your actions are aligned with your purpose or not at any given moment.
As I said earlier, if your objective is not clear, passion may be the fastest way to create a living disaster.
Let’s understand this point with an example…
For instance, if you believe that your purpose is to become a millionaire, you’ll eventually start thinking about earning money.
You’ll start building multiple streams of income.
But down the road, after 4-5 years, you’ll realize that perhaps money doesn’t solve all the problems in the world.
Although, the author highlights the idea that money and fame are the only thing to worry about – and everybody should be crazy about it, trust me, it’s terrible advice.
You also need inner transformation.
In that case, you have a new purpose: To become a self-realized person.
Now there are two purposes:
- To become rich.
- To become a self-realized person.
But since you were only thinking about earning wealth, you didn’t pay much attention to your inner growth.
The lesson here is:
If you don’t handle your strong desires carefully, you may end up wasting your time and energy doing something that you didn’t need in the first place.
The key is to find your true purpose.
Just be aware of why you want to achieve a goal so badly.
You must be clear about your goals.
Recommended read: Ikigai Summary
Try to grow in all aspects of your life.
People believe that to master one aspect of your life, you’ll have to sacrifice another.
But it’s possible if you are smart and strategic.
Tony Robbins also says that:
Achieving extraordinary results means one thing—focus. Where focus goes, energy flows.
Think about it.
If you devote more energy to your fitness, your body will become stronger.
If you devote most of your energy to building multiple streams of income, your financial portfolio will become stronger.
The more you read, the more your brain gets stronger.
The question is:
Where are you spending most of your time and energy?
Are you giving most of your time to your relationships?
Are you more focused on your career?
It could be anything.
If you don’t want to remain an average, you must find out which aspects of your life are worth investing time and energy.
Life comes with changing circumstances. (Gautama Buddha has also said that change and suffering are the only constants in life.)
Not all of them are worth investing your resources in.
The main aspects you should look for are:
- Spiritual & Mental Health
All these aspects are important in life.
Personally, I think that spiritual aspect is way more important than anything else. If you are a spiritual person, you can question your beliefs and find your erroneous zones.
Focus on these aspects with a laser-sharp focus.
Our minds must be fed with the correct information.
Then there are our bank accounts. They also need nourishment. We all need money to pay our bills, right?
Also, there are emotional banks, our relationships, and they also need some food.
It’s okay to master multiple aspects of your life. But choose wisely.
Limit yourself at first.
Then expand your circle of influence slowly.
Ask yourself over and over again:
Is this aspect of life important to me?
This question will give you clarity in your thoughts.
Suggested read: The One Thing Summary
Never let your false doubts and fears control you.
Doubts and fears may be annoying.
But they might also be helpful at times.
For instance, doubt and fear can save you from dangers.
In The Gift Of Fear (Summary), I learned that fear is also a gift. And it’s essential for our survival.
If we don’t have our fears and doubts, we may end up in a terrible situation.
Our brain is so sophisticated that sometimes the subtle aspects, which were meant for our survival, prevent us from achieving our goals.
Especially when the goals to be achieved are tough and appear impossible.
But where do such doubtful thoughts creep into our heads?
Such thoughts mostly come from outside. From people who haven’t achieved anything big in their lives.
And they intentionally or unintentionally pull us back.
It sounds as if those people are found far away.
But they might also be your close friends or relatives.
That’s the hard truth.
Remember, we are the average of people around us.
Just think about it.
Have you ever thought about why your friend is not like Elon Musk or Bill Gates?
Why do we enjoy the company of our friends so much? It’s because we get a sense of familiarity when we are around them.
Familiarity has safety and comfort.
Both of which are enemies of change.
Our friends give a lot of data about how we think and what we believe in.
So, whenever you tell your friends that you want to become a millionaire, they will say that it’s too complicated and that only a few fortunate people get there.
They want good for you — but unintentionally, they pull you back.
What happens then is you start doubting yourself.
You start thinking, “Maybe my friend is right. I will be crazy if I pursue that unrealistic dream. I should think about something else.”
Don’t worry too much about those people who are not going to change anyway.
Avoid them if possible.
If possible, use them as a catalyst to fuel your growth.
And if external factors weren’t enough, sometimes, the false concepts in our minds also hold us back.
Yes, it’s true!
There is also a thing called self-doubt.
Other people may doubt your abilities, but you should never let self-doubt creep in.
You can fight the doubt that’s coming from outside.
But it’s 10x harder to fight the doubt that has originated within you.
Self-doubt is the enemy inside.
It’s hard to beat that evil. It requires a different approach.
It’s easy to say all this, but in real life, it takes a lot of courage.
It requires courage to say YES when everyone — even your friends — are saying NO.
When you are fixated on a big goal, everyone will think that you are crazy and need counseling.
And maybe it is not good for everyone.
The strategy to get crazy about his goals might have helped the author, but it might not be suitable for you.
But as I said earlier, your desires and passions are a powerful force.
If you want to use them, you must know how to direct them properly.
When we discuss our doubts and fear, they often give us more data about us and our environment.
So, I recommend that you consider your fears & doubts. And see whether their inputs are worth considering or not.
If not, simply ignore them.
Any insignificant thing(s) holding you back should be ignored or dealt with. This will increase the probability of your success.
Also read: The courage to be disliked (summary)
Don’t let your fears trouble you and have a mind of steel.
We all have fears and insecurities.
Sometimes, they interfere with our path to success.
The thing is:
We keep searching for safety and comfort.
Nothing wrong with that.
But doing so, we forget that we have to face risks to go beyond our current potential.
And when we start to avoid risk all the time, we get used to it.
The problem is:
Adapting to this risk-aversion behavior makes us a coward.
Whenever we feel any potential risk, we tend to avoid it.
Even for the things that are important and must be done at all costs, we choose the easy way. Why? Because we are afraid of failure.
We imagine how everybody will mock us and how our entire life will become a joke. (This is just imagination, though. Nothing happens. And even if it does, hypothetically, you can get over it with courage.)
As a result, we become weak.
Even silly challenges scare the hell out of us.
No situation should trouble us — no matter how tough it may look.
The only way out is to become stronger.
You have to become so strong that your fears won’t control you.
The fear itself will fear you then. Though it won’t happen in reality because fear is within us, it’s not something outside.
Fear is also a thought that initiates behavioral changes within us.
You must have a strong mindset such that when you face any fearful situation, you understand it without running away from it — and ultimately overcome it.
Is it easy?
Of course not.
It’s tough. It’s not something that you could learn in 2 days and say, “it’s done.”
That’s why you must be passionate about learning how you can overcome your fear and break out of your tiny comfort zone.
Just think about it.
Who gets controlled by the situations?
Only those who aren’t strong enough to tackle challenging situations live in fear and expect someone else to help them.
When we lack knowledge, there is ignorance.
And that ignorance (not knowing fear) — causes a sense of fear inside us.
Get stronger and defeat your inner demons.
Obviously, not just in theory — but in your daily life.
Also read: You Can Win Summary
Your Beliefs can make you or break you.
I know what you are saying right now:
“I have already heard it countless times. It doesn’t work for me. Let me scroll past this and quickly get to the next lesson.”
Did you understand its meaning properly?
Probably it’s not what you think.
Maybe you tried believing in yourself before and failed terribly.
Let’s discuss it further…
Let’s start with this question: Why do we believe anything?
We believe because we don’t want our brain to waste its energy.
That’s why we believe, don’t we?
Our beliefs are there to save our time and process thoughts quickly.
When you believe that you can achieve something BIG, you rewire your brain to think you have the required potential.
Then you don’t waste your time worrying about the failures.
Why does “Believe in yourself” doesn’t work for us?
Most of the time, it doesn’t work for us because we think that by merely believing in a big idea, we will get results. This is not true at all.
You can’t get results just by thinking about something.
I’m not saying that thinking doesn’t help. It helps you plan.
But you only get results when you act.
You have to put yourself to work.
Even when the work is tedious, even when you don’t feel like doing it, you have to concentrate and work — even if the people around you don’t believe in you.
Here is a disclaimer:
Before you believe in anything, investigate the thought or idea properly.
Buddha also said that you shouldn’t accept any idea without reasoning.
Otherwise, “believing in yourself” might bring terrible results to your life.
Believe that you can achieve or fulfill your dreams.
I also recommend you investigate even your dreams before you go all in.
Then just be honest and do the work.
That’s it. (Why make it more complicated?)
Recommended read: Outliers Summary
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I highly recommend it!
When it comes to how actionable the ideas in this book are, I would say that the author has tried to motivate the reader and urge him to become exceptional.
There were many areas where I disagreed with the author, though.
A lot of ideas in the book are impractical and doesn’t work in reality.
I don’t suggest anybody to be overly focused on anything without proper evaluation.
I give this book a rating of 3/10
FAQs about Be Obsessed Or Be Average by Grant Cardone
Grant Cardone is the author of this book.
Is the book worth reading?
No, I don’t recommend this book unless you are looking for quick motivation.
How long does this book take to finish?
You can expect 2-3 hours of reading.
Who is the ideal reader for this book?
Someone who has seen numerous failures and looking for motivation. Or someone who is highly ambitious but not getting approval from other people.
What does Grant Cardone do?
Grant Cardone is a bestselling author and a renowned sales trainer.
Now it’s your turn
That’s it for now!
I hope this review will help you decide whether you should by Grant Cardone’s books or not.
Please don’t hesitate to share it with your friends and family members if you enjoyed it.
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